Of the 5 siblings my one brother from out of town thought she was just fine and even was in denial when she had a minor fender bender.A blessing in disguise as then we told mom the courts took her License but she had a shuttle where we moved her,so she got out just fine and made friends fast.Unfortunately she fell and broke her hip and that was a game changer then the condition declined by leaps/bounds.Had to prove to the one brother that she hit someone.Came close to dis owning him as he was in denial,fortunately no one argued over the estate much of it absorbed by health care
That is part of the problem with my mom vis-a-vis Dad's care. She is right there, closer than any of us but for a long time she was just in denial. There is no other way to describe it. Dad didn't know where he was and she was still trying to get him to do chores and wondering why he couldn't get them done.
It is very hard to accept that this man who taught me so many things now literally can't operate a coat hanger. It is also weird having a year-and-a-half year old son who is literally learning the things that dad is forgetting. Dealing with the two of them has gotten eerily similar as my son grows and learns and my dad declines and forgets.
More advice:
In the beginning you are going to get frustrated with them. Try not to take it out on them but sometimes (especially early on) you'll forget that they have an incurable disease and get mad that they screwed up whatever it was. Don't beat yourself up too much for that, just learn from it and move on.
I remember early on my dad was installing a screen door. As home repairs go, this is reasonably easy. Dad taught me how many years ago and I've probably installed dozens of them over the years. Anyway, he called me and asked me to help. I stopped by thinking I would only be there a few minutes because the only part of that job that is really a two-man job is the actual installation after the door is ready to hang because you need one guy to hold the door in place while the other guy screws it to the door frame.
PRO TIP:
Screen doors ship set up to be either right-handed or left-handed and with the hardware needing to be attached. Typically you set up the door and attach the latch/closer/etc with the door on saw-horses in the front yard, then hang the door when you are all done. Your natural inclination will probably be to hold the door at the frame, then turn around and lay the door on the saw-horses to get it ready. DO NOT do it that way. When you do it that way the door is backwards from the opening so as you get it ready to install you have to keep mentally flipping the image of the door. Instead, set the door up in the front yard with the top of the door toward the house. That way the door is exactly as it will be when finally installed. You can see where everything goes much more easily because it is all straight forward and right in front of you instead of backwards and behind you.
Anyway, back to my story. I arrived and my dad (who taught me how to install screen doors) had screwed this door up six ways to Sunday. He had the closer mounted to the outside of the door, the inside latch was backwards, the outside latch was upside down, etc. I had to undo everything he had done, then redo it the right way. At the time I was frustrated (mostly because I had a date with my (now) wife that evening). I razzed dad about the screw up like we always razzed each other about things like that when he was younger but this was different. He hadn't just messed it up because he was in a hurry, he couldn't figure it out.