I'd say the biggest problem with youth sports is not the parents (they are a problem) but rather when we were growing up, coaching was a part time job. Today, many have turned it into full time roles with multiple teams. You want to play on a non YMCA team, it's a 9 month commitment for soccer here in KC (few exceptions). Like gymnastics... 20hrs a week to move up. Don't want to do that to your 8 yr old daughter, no problem. We just won't teach her anything more. Dance...? well, it's a 11 month commitment if you want them learn.
Parents make choices, but the options are becoming more constrained. As a parent who wants their kids playing multiple sports or in multiple activities, it is tougher. I'm sure we could do better. It is also tough when they want to play with their friends. And I get that.. we all did.
We're basically speaking the same language, but I can tell you that even in 3-month recreational seasons, parents are still the biggest problems. :-)
I would say the focus on professional coaches and 9-month+ commitments is driven by parents who are seeking glory and/or NCAA scholarships. And it's a fools' errand. Great athletes are great athletes. I've seen this as a coach in soccer: a kid leaves a recreational league to go get the professional coaching, the 4x/week practices, and the 9-month season, and comes back to the recreational league 2-3 years later. The ones who were above average when they left are still above average, but not better than that. The ones who were rock stars when they left, are still rock stars, but haven't put much space between the great athletes who never went to to clubs. For the great athletes, the additional touches they get from the competitive programs have given them a little edge, but even that isn't as big as you would think.
Adults play sports for fun, for fitness, and to take our minds off of the hard things in life. Kids should be playing for the same reasons, but it's really, really easy to get sucked into trying to make li'l Johnny or Jane the next big thing. It normally ends with Johnny and Jane dropping the sport before age 14. And for many who make it past that, it often ends with resentment over all the time sunk in something that felt like a job.
I'm painting with a broad brush here; there are plenty of exceptions in a country of 300+ million people, but we could all stand to dial youth sports back. And it's the parents who will (or won't) do it.