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It would be bookin' it from Naples to Miami.  But good luck with the environmental hurdles on that one.  It could be coated in the skins from hunted pythons maybe...

It would have to be built in the median of the existing highway.

How does closing bard down earlier mesh with the paragraph above it? 
And btw, Tampa is basically the strip club capital of earth.

Because too many of them are open super late and too many morons get loaded up on liquor and drugs and do dumb shit. 

Let the really expensive, exclusive, fancy places with dress codes stay open late as hell. All the other ones- shut em down early.  

Tampa is the strip club capital of meth’d out toothless white trash, maybe. Tampa strip clubs do not have shit on South Florida strip clubs. The girls in general are way better looking in South Florida, and it’s especially true of the titty bar crowd.

South Florida has the most beautiful women of anywhere in this entire country- and it’s not particularly close. 

This sounds deeply weird to me, like if you're rich, you get the right to have entertainment when less right folks should not.

The people causing all the f’ing commotion and chaos and anarchy in south beach right now aren’t rich. They aren’t white. They aren’t college kids.

The intention is to get as many of those people out and stop them from coming as possible.

Because too many of them are open super late and too many morons get loaded up on liquor and drugs and do dumb shit.

Let the really expensive, exclusive, fancy places with dress codes stay open late as hell. All the other ones- shut em down early. 

Tampa is the strip club capital of meth’d out toothless white trash, maybe. Tampa strip clubs do not have shit on South Florida strip clubs. The girls in general are way better looking in South Florida, and it’s especially true of the titty bar crowd.

South Florida has the most beautiful women of anywhere in this entire country- and it’s not particularly close.

pure platinum in Ft. Lauderdale didn't suck back in the 90s

The people causing all the f’ing commotion and chaos and anarchy in south beach right now aren’t rich. They aren’t white. They aren’t college kids.

The intention is to get as many of those people out and stop them from coming as possible.

Yeah, I think this is called racism.  Classism?  Maybe it's just mean or wrong.

Because too many of them are open super late and too many morons get loaded up on liquor and drugs and do dumb shit.

Is this not an appeal for rich, classy types to be out late as well?  You're pretending two different groups are out late for different reasons when they're not.

More weird.