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Topic: OT: Dementia/Alzheimers

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MrNubbz

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Re: OT: Dementia/Alzheimers
« Reply #42 on: January 10, 2021, 08:27:15 AM »
My mother has been drifting into dementia for over five years and now she's really there and deteriorating rapidly.  When we finally took the car keys from her about 3-1/2 years ago, it was past the time we should have done that.  Fortunately, she hadn't hurt anybody.  We're moving her at the end of the month from an apartment at a senior apartment complex to a much smaller one at a nice complex that accommodates a transition from independent living to assisted living to memory care.  A couple of years ago, I though she could live for another 10 years.  Now, I'm not sure if she'll last another 10 months.
Best wishes CWS,as been mentioned perhaps only one person at a time will be aloud to see her.And because of the heinous nature of the illness even if you left her to use the rest room she may be surprised when you get back,Good Luck
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medinabuckeye1

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Re: OT: Dementia/Alzheimers
« Reply #43 on: January 10, 2021, 01:14:03 PM »
Been praying for you Medina.

My son passed Michigan week 2012. I know in the grand scheme of life Football is pretty insignificant, but during that game it was the first time I smiled. Death is hard, confusing, sad and frustrating all mixed together. Look for those things that can bring you and your family some comfort as you figure out the new normal.

For me it was Buckeye football. If you are up for it, keep giving us updates, and we, these semi-anonymous internet friends, will keep responding. Hope you can take some moments of solace Monday night.

Cheers, and Best Wishes.
Ty
Thank you @TyphonInc .

Oh my, losing a child would be even worse. At least with my dad I can take some solace in the 80 years he had and the 45 years I had with him.

You make a great point. I'll try to enjoy the game Monday night if I am even able to watch it. That statement illustrates just how insignificant football is. My team, my alma mater is about to play the biggest game they've played in six years and I don't even know if I'll see it.

I do appreciate the responses from my semi-annonymous internet friends, thank you all.

medinabuckeye1

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Re: OT: Dementia/Alzheimers
« Reply #44 on: January 10, 2021, 02:10:40 PM »
Great OP, Medina, and great discussion.

I lost a friend of 16 years last spring.  He had very mild Parkinson's when I met him.  It got progressively worse, of course, and then came the associated Lewy body dementia.  Today, cleaning out my car, I found the receipt for the last time I took Saturday lunch to him in memory care.  It was from On the Border Mexican Grill and Cantina. A burrito dinner for me, an enchilada dinner for him.  He loved Mexican food, barbecue, pizza, and hamburgers from small, family-owned burger joints.  I can't drive anywhere in the Tulsa metro area without passing some little restaurant we hit once, twice, or 50 times.

My mother has been drifting into dementia for over five years and now she's really there and deteriorating rapidly.  When we finally took the car keys from her about 3-1/2 years ago, it was past the time we should have done that.  Fortunately, she hadn't hurt anybody.  We're moving her at the end of the month from an apartment at a senior apartment complex to a much smaller one at a nice complex that accommodates a transition from independent living to assisted living to memory care.  A couple of years ago, I though she could live for another 10 years.  Now, I'm not sure if she'll last another 10 months.
Good luck @CWSooner .

Much of what you said sounds all too familiar. Your comment about 10 years/10 months hits right home. Prior to his December hospitalization his dementia was slowly deteriorating and his heart issues hadn't caused any problems in years. Now we've moved from that to discussing a DNR as a very real and current issue. Suddenly, 10 months seems very unlikely.

CWSooner

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Re: OT: Dementia/Alzheimers
« Reply #45 on: January 10, 2021, 07:09:51 PM »
Now my mother is refusing to move and is saying she will shoot herself if we make her move.  It's an empty threat, as she has no firearms, but it shows where her mind is.
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MrNubbz

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Re: OT: Dementia/Alzheimers
« Reply #46 on: January 10, 2021, 07:14:47 PM »
Most folks aren't afraid of death/pain it's loss of agency and self determination
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bayareabadger

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Re: OT: Dementia/Alzheimers
« Reply #47 on: January 11, 2021, 07:32:29 AM »
I’m late to this, but beyond sorry to hear that Medina. As you wrote, life does sometimes have that odd, difficult symmetry and things sometimes seem to pile up all at once.

Brutus Buckeye

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Re: OT: Dementia/Alzheimers
« Reply #48 on: January 11, 2021, 11:10:32 AM »
It's odd how the mind works. I mentioned upthread that my uncle could still play cards after he got it, and it would bring his personality out again. 

Before he had dementia, he would always give my mother a hard time about dealing left handed. I also deal left handed, but he never said anything about it to me because I am left handed. 

Once he got really bad, he had no idea who either of us were, let alone what hand we write with, but every time it was my mother's turn to deal he would call her out for dealing left handed like he was just noticing for the first time. But then when it was my turn, he didn't say a word about it. It was like there was just something in his brain that said "I am supposed to be busting this woman's chops about this." 
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betarhoalphadelta

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Re: OT: Dementia/Alzheimers
« Reply #49 on: January 11, 2021, 01:12:43 PM »
I was playing golf yesterday and as we were waiting on the 9th tee, we saw that one of the balls from the group behind us had gone up the cart path past the 8th green and come to rest beyond the green. We noticed a guy looking for the ball well short of the green where there's a little creek, and mentioned to one of his foursome that the ball was up where it was... He just responded "yeah, he's senile, he's gonna spend the next 5 minutes looking for it down there anyway..."

Took us a second to realize that he was serious. 

It's a weird situation that his mind and body are good enough to play the game, but he's basically gotta have handlers because the rest of the process around it is just completely gone. 

FearlessF

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Re: OT: Dementia/Alzheimers
« Reply #50 on: January 11, 2021, 01:14:28 PM »
Now my mother is refusing to move and is saying she will shoot herself if we make her move.  It's an empty threat, as she has no firearms, but it shows where her mind is.
that's rough


hopefully she will come around

my Dad's mother was one of the sweetest ladies ever, but I saw a side of her I never thought she had when they moved her into the old folk's home.
"Courage; Generosity; Fairness; Honor; In these are the true awards of manly sport."

FearlessF

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Re: OT: Dementia/Alzheimers
« Reply #51 on: January 11, 2021, 01:17:24 PM »
I was playing golf yesterday and as we were waiting on the 9th tee, we saw that one of the balls from the group behind us had gone up the cart path past the 8th green and come to rest beyond the green. We noticed a guy looking for the ball well short of the green where there's a little creek, and mentioned to one of his foursome that the ball was up where it was... He just responded "yeah, he's senile, he's gonna spend the next 5 minutes looking for it down there anyway..."

Took us a second to realize that he was serious.

It's a weird situation that his mind and body are good enough to play the game, but he's basically gotta have handlers because the rest of the process around it is just completely gone.
hah, some guys just "know" where their ball is.  Just know it's in the creek.  I have poor eyesight so I don't argue with them.  I'm not often correct.  I'll just go find their ball and then let them know.  Helps speed up play.  And speeding up play is always a good thing with my group. 
"Courage; Generosity; Fairness; Honor; In these are the true awards of manly sport."

medinabuckeye1

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Re: OT: Dementia/Alzheimers
« Reply #52 on: January 11, 2021, 03:57:48 PM »
Now my mother is refusing to move and is saying she will shoot herself if we make her move.  It's an empty threat, as she has no firearms, but it shows where her mind is.
That is rough.  Good luck @CWSooner .  We dealt with a similar issue when we took dad's driver's license away.  

TyphonInc

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Re: OT: Dementia/Alzheimers
« Reply #53 on: January 12, 2021, 12:37:50 PM »
I don't want to hijack this thread, so if my post fits somewhere else mods please move it.

Ty's family has had a tough week. We got the sweetest little puppy 6 days ago. 48 hours after getting her it became apparent she was really sick. Took her to the vet, and was told she had parvo, and she was put into an isolation unit for 4 days (and cause of covid even we couldn't visit.) Shortly after the Buckeyes got blasted, we received a call that she had passed.

My kids are crushed. I'm pissed, dropped over 2k to buy a puppy and vet care, only to have her for 2 days.
I know a dog is way less significant than a loved relative, but there's a hole aching in my heart right now.

Edit: oh and another sh!ty (pun intended) thing about Parvo, is it's spread though the dogs feces, and is a super hardy bug that can live for up to a year outside in the soil, so the vet highly recommends we don't introduce another dog into our home till next winter.
« Last Edit: January 12, 2021, 01:38:52 PM by TyphonInc »

MrNubbz

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Re: OT: Dementia/Alzheimers
« Reply #54 on: January 12, 2021, 12:40:35 PM »
I would have a long talk with the Breeder or an Attorney
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TyphonInc

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Re: OT: Dementia/Alzheimers
« Reply #55 on: January 12, 2021, 03:12:49 PM »
I would have a long talk with the Breeder or an Attorney
She was a rescue, that we got from the vet. I've got a lawyer on retainer, and have a call into him.

 

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