OT - Why?

[CharleyHorse46]

A thread for wondering aloud life's mysteries.

[CharleyHorse46]

Is water not as wet as it used to be?

Is it just not as wet where I live?

The other day, I used an oscillating mulitool to scrape the old discolored grout from out of the cracks between the tiles in the spare bathroom and picked up 25 pound bag of some white sanded grout to replace it.   The instructions on the back of the bag said to mix 2 quarts of water with the 25 lb bag.

I only wanted to use a quarter of the bag so I mixed in 2 cups of water.

It wasn't enough.  It wasn't near enough.   And it wasn't enough until I had mixed in more than a quart of water.  So why did they make me think a dab would do?

But it's not just grout.  Frozen vegetables are the same way.

Look at a bag of frozen green beans.  It will tell you to put the entire bag of beans in a half cup of boiling water.

A half cup?   A half cup won't even submerge all of those beans.  What the heck?

Is something wrong with my water?  Why won't it go as far as instruction writers imagine it should?

[longhorn320]

The main thing you did wrong is to read the instructions

No true man ever reads the instructions first

I thought you would have known that

[CharleyHorse46]

Well I guess that means I'm not a true man.  And here I've been faithful to my wife for all these decades.   Weird.

But I am a city man.  I'm not like my forefathers who slaughtered hogs and tinkered with tractors.  I've been taught to read the fine print lest I lose a deposit or owe a penalty.  I've learned to lend credence to the written word.  If it's committed to writing it should be defensible.

Rather galling when it misses by a mile.

[longhorn320]

If cold makes things shrink and heat makes things expand

why does water expand when it freezes

so Ive asked this before and nobody could tell me why

[CharleyHorse46]

That's a damn good question and we demand an answer.

[MikeDeTiger]

One thing I learned from the ladies in my life over the years when it comes to cooking is that you almost always need more or less water than instructions tell you, and always bake 25 degrees less than instructions tell you, and probably for less time too.  

I agree completely, the instructions should be correct.  And if they're not, they should be labeled "Suggestions," which would help me understand that maybe this isn't gonna work out after all.  Calling it "Instructions" implies a guarantee that if I do what they say, all will be well.  

[longhorn320]

OK here is another one

Why do cows always face north or south when eating

I think Texas cows do this to either keep a watchful eye on our sooner friends or to moon them

[MikeDeTiger]

This isn't a "why?" question, but rather than start another thread I thought I'd drop it here.

Does facebook make people say dumb things, or has it merely exposed the fact that most of my friends and family always had the dumb in them, and facebook has merely given it more exposure?  

At first I thought I could test this by checking to see if it made me say dumb things, but then I realized people rarely know when they're being dumb.  I call it the Oblivion Conundrum.  So that's not a good test.  

What do you think?

[longhorn320]

not sure about facebook but its clear this forum is a good dumb indicator 

[CharleyHorse46]

I think saying dumb things is an extension of friendliness.

Remember Bill Engvall's "Here's your sign" routine?  Most of the time we're tempted to give people a sign for saying stupid things they aren't saying the stupid thing to impart wisdom but rather to sympathize.

Like, "I'm going to my mom's funeral."  "Oh did she die?"  That sounds like the height of stupidity but it's really just an awkward expression of human interest and friendliness.   Very few people have to wherewithal to handle situations with more aplomb.

Then again... sometimes people really do say stupid things.

[CharleyHorse46]

Let me ask you if this happens to any of you:

You go somewhere where you're in close proximity to law enforcement personnel and they act weird around you, cutting you sidelong glances, acting nervous, standing up straighter, keeping their hands near this pistols, etc...

I had been subconsciously noticing this for months.   It used to not be this way, or I used to not notice.  I used to work near the Department of Public Safety and dine at places troopers and rangers dined at in droves.  No problem.  Nothing out of the ordinary.

But lately - over the last two years or so - if I go to a burger place or restaurant where there's a sheriff or policeman or trooper, they seem to act real skittish around me.  The phenomena had been registering as an "oh that's weird" thought but it was never uttered or brought to the forefront of consciousness until I took my second-oldest son to P. Terry's a few weeks ago.

Two APD officers were walking out as we were walking in and they both passed us warily, looking at me and acting uptight.

Johnny was like, "What is it with you and cops, dad?   Why do they always look like they're scared of you?"

I'm like I don't know.  So we discussed it over lunch.  My theory is that they can tell I'm 1/8th black and they're racially profiling me.  Johnny's theory is that I look like some guy in the Walking Dead who kills people with a baseball bat.

I don't know what it is.  I just know it's weird.  Puts me on guard.

[longhorn320]

Back in High School Id phone my girlfriend and her mother would answer

Id say is Gail there and she would say yes and then silence

thinking her mother had put down the phone and was getting her daughter I just sat there and listened

after at lease 30 seconds her mother would ask do you want to talk to her

this used to drive me nuts

after this happened several times I started just saying may I speak with Gail which cut out the dumbness

[CharleyHorse46]

Getting people on the phone.  Yep.  Always awkward.  I always hated it when I'd call up a girl and her dad would answer.  I'm not sure if I just imagined it or not but often it seemed like they would let out an audible snort before they'd call their daughter to the phone.

Folks who have never had to go through the ordeal of having to ask for somebody over the phone just don't know how good they have it.