You Know What I Hate....?

[CharleyHorse46]

I like beds and I like boxes

[BrownCounty]

Im a very busy man and got things to do

POTD

[BrownCounty]

Nobody's got a chunk of money anymore, but anybody can shave off $20 month for something, and pay twice for it over time.

I don't know how lower middle-class households live without a bookkeeper to keep track of all monthly and weekly obligations.  I guess they just wait for the phone call.

[FearlessF]

my bookkeeper is forgetful and lazy

So, I'm encouraged to use the one time full payment option at all times

yup, I'm the bookkeeper

[CharleyHorse46]

Today I was reminded of something I hate: poky a-holes.

Poky a-holes sounds like poking a-holes, but that’s a horse of a different and... (drum roll please) we’re not going to get... in... to that, right now.  SWIDT?

Poky a-holes is the ax I want to grind.

In life we go at different speeds.  Sometimes in a motorized vehicle or on foot we have to slow down to accommodate the slower (aka poky) ones.  It’s ok.

And sometimes in life we encounter a-holes.  It can be disheartening or entertaining.  Thing about a-holes though is that they’re honest with their feelings.   It’s ok.

But poky a-holes.   The mix is too strong and too hurtful.  Let me tell you what I mean.

A car pulls out in front of you and slows you down while there’s no room to pass.  They’re poky but they’re not actually a poky a-hole until you see them look right at you in their review mirror and take thir foot off the accelerator to go even slower.

Or you’re coming out a door of a business as someone else is coming in.  You step aside to be a gentleman.  There’s a smile on your face and no malice in your heart.  But the the recipient of your kindness perceptibly slows down.  Now they’re not only large but they seem to have acquired a temporary limp.  Poky a-hole.

You’re driving home through your neighborhood at 25 or 30 miles an hour.  You don’t want to run over anybody.  A couple in their 60s are jaywalking so you ease to a complete stop as they slow their pace and give you the stink eye.   Poky a-holes.

Where do these people come from?  Why are they so hateful and ugly?

Back in the day, back on the Easide, young brothers would occasionally strut slowly across the path of traffic.  But they always had big shit eating grins on their face and a ready laugh when they made you chuckle.  You could tell they meant no harm they were just having fun.

Now it’s folks of all colors.  Milfs in Hondas, elderly people, middle aged folks young couples.

Rude, poky a-holes angry at people just like themselves for just doing the same thing in the same place at the same time.

What has this world come to?

[FearlessF]

the poky a-hole that is driving plenty slow until you decide to pass, then they put down their phone or just decide to speed up because they notice you're passing.  Then for a few miles they drive fast enough to be right on your ass.

Eventually they go back to their poky speed and leave you alone

[MikeDeTiger]

Reminds of back in the early 90's when Denis Leary had a video on MTV, song called "Asshole" that included the lyrics:  

I'll drive really slow 
in the ultra-fast lane
while people behind me 
are going insane

'cuz I'm an asshooooooooole......

[CharleyHorse46]

Gap closers.

I hate gap closers.

I live for gaps.

People who close gaps are just hateful and inconsiderate.

[CharleyHorse46]

Reminds of back in the early 90's when Denis Leary had a video on MTV, song called "Asshole" that included the lyrics:  

I'll drive really slow
in the ultra-fast lane
while people behind me
are going insane

'cuz I'm an asshooooooooole......

He was the step dad in Sand Lot.
And whenever I hear the dude on the Home Depot commercial it sounds like Roddy McDowall doing a Denis Leary imitation.

[utee94]

I hate the poky a-hole pedestrian in a parking lot, that crosses the driving lane walking slowly on a diagonal, taking up way more time than if they simply crossed directly at a perpindicular.  

[BrownCounty]

Gap closers.

I hate gap closers.

I live for gaps.

People who close gaps are just hateful and inconsiderate.

Yes, ISWYDT

[UT-Erin03]

Gap closers.

I hate gap closers.

I live for gaps.

People who close gaps are just hateful and inconsiderate.

My sister once told a story years ago about how she liked to box in the speeders on the highways.  Like, she would purposefully pull into the fast lane and go the same speed as a Uhaul or Mac Truck that's in the slow lane just to keep cars from flying over 80+ down the highway.    She felt she was doing people favors by slowing down the speeders, but I had to break it to her that she was not following the laws of the road and could even get herself into a road rage sitch here in TX with all those gun-toting maniacs everywhere.   I certainly hope she doesn't get her jollies doing this anymore, I think everyone in the room at the time she told us this were gasping and appalled that she would think that was okay.
But it wasn't the first time I discovered my sister is kind of an asshole.  

[FearlessF]

some folks just can't help themselves

they simply can't conform to society

[CharleyHorse46]

When we are 6 year-old first-graders, we all experiment with being tattle tales.  Most of us soon learn that nobody likes a tattle tale and snitches get stitches.  If that wasn't enough, seventh-grade gossip will enforce the concept by adding a little lesson about glass houses.

But amazingly there are some who slip through all of that and still imagine God put them on this earth to be their brother's keeper.

These folks tend to be 7th grade social studies teachers, mall cops and HOA board members.

Folks like that are especially bothersome in conservative Christian churches where they are wont to claim that such nosy interference is a manifestation of the fruits of spirit called discernment and exhortation.

Personally, I like my exhortation to be a tad more encouraging and less critical but what's a feller to do?

In hind sight, Baylor probably should've admitted more kids with those "gifts."

Butt a la ass, I digress.

I don't like keepers.  I don't like to be kept.  I like to run wild and free.